An Emptiness of Melancholy


Mel-an-chol-y; noun: A feeling of pensive sadness, typically with no obvious cause.




Emptiness in itself is a melancholy. When we don't feel, does it count as hurting? I would say it does solely on the fact that when one is 'empty', we're devoid, tired, and silent. Not everything that hurts draws attention to itself just the way that things in pain don't always scream. They can be silent too.



A quote that is all too true. That moment of pure and utter emotion whilst literally feeling the emptiest I've ever felt inside is one of the strangest events I have and will ever experience. For me it was a burning near my heart while my brain and thoughts lay still. This feeling of 'everything and nothing at once' I labeled as an emptiness of melancholy; while sitting at a pool as said emotion enveloped me. And it was a day I will never forget as I sat there with my feet in the water, alone, with only the wind to watch my silence. Join me on my quest to find the meaning of Emptiness. Of Everything and Nothing. Of all that we are, were, and will be.  










  But if I sit in the rain maybe I can drown in something other than my own thoughts:
When I feel empty, I'm absorbed by my thoughts. Not thoughts about my day or my favorite book, but thoughts of nothing. I find myself concentrating on the emptiness and it reflects in my mind. As strange as it sounds; that thought of nothing rings in my brain louder than as if I where thinking about anything else. It fills me up completely and makes me feel from the bottom of my toes to the hairline of my head. These melancholy thoughts aren't sad or 'empty'. They're overpowering and incredibly there. They made me silently question the meaning of life and why we should suffer for others sakes. It made me think about nothing in the sense of material. My mind was filled to the brim and incredibly full. These moments I would feel at peace with myself and relish in that solitude calm. But, the nothing would only grow louder and it sometimes drowned out everything else. Believe me when I say you can think of nothing and everything; and can be both empty and filled at the same time.

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